Sneaking Down On You

Here's one that snuck up on us. For $5 million bucks, you can buy a space right across from the beloved Botanic Gardens. No, not that strange tiny triangular space on the east side past the S train tracks (the picture of what you could build there is hysterical - designed for wee people with a triangular design aesthetic). No I'm talking about this space:

As reported by Joyce Chen at something called buzzbuzzhome.com, this could soon be something akin to:

More than 20,000 buildable square feet in all. Granted it's no behemoth, With an enormous communications tower across the street, and Empire Blvd becoming the Champs d'Elysees, you could imagine you're living right across from the Eiffel Tower?

So while Rome fiddles and Nero burns, the march south continues. Would be nice to have a, er, Planning Study to look at how all this random development could and should look. I wonder where we might get one of those?

If this scene keeps up, below, taken by your trusty correspondent at last week's community board brawl, it'll get harder and harder to imagine any kinds of limits on anything. Imagine the 13 seconds below, plus another two hours of same, and you'll get a sense of what we were treated to:

After enduring insults and gross accusations, not to mention the serving of a baseless lawsuit, Pearl Miles then read the basis for and the resolution itself, during which she was shouted down for doing so. At one point she couldn't take it anymore and started shouting "Shut up, shut up" and that episode, caught on video, is now making the rounds to show how arrogant she and CB9 are.

And now, apparently, for doing a study of zoning in the district, we will also lose J'ouvert, according to this guy. How on earth do you get there? One of NYC's signature events will be stopped by a zoning study? Why? Because the luxury-livers who have already signed the leases on the 25th Floor of their decadent flats can't handle a street scene? Shoulda been on Central Park West a couple weekends ago. Those folks endured a scene louder and messier than even their annual Thanksgiving Day Parade, and it lasted hours longer than J'ouvert. Okay, it was mostly during the day, but still. I effing love J'Ouvert and would go to the mat for it. The blog that claims J'Ouvert's imminent demise is a Steel Pan blog, and you and I both know that Steel Pan blogs are generally known for their moderate and objective coverage of Planning Studies. So this is truly uncharacteristic.

The hysteria around this thing is nuts. MTOPP is now going to protest the Community Board clubhouse on Nostrand next Wednesday. Don't forget to call in sick and join! By forcing out the City employee Pearl Miles as District Manager you'll halt runaway gentrification AND ensure that Empire Blvd becomes a non-residential strollers paradise.

Madness. I couldn't MAKE this shit up.