what's going on here?

from 2011

You've seen it a million times. You may have given up wondering what the H is going on there. Some of the ugly construction barriers have come down, and it would appear the end may be in sight for the ongoing "restoration" of the landmarked building on Empire Boulevard at the southeastern tip of the Botanic Garden. Over the years I've heard many creative guesses about the building's origins, but of course resident Brooklyn historian Montrose Morris got to the bottom of it (here). The building was commissioned by the City as a fire house, quickly became a dispatch center, and the rest is a story of typical City indifference to the state of an important neighborhood landmark. Except...that's not the whole story, and Montrose missed a key part of the REAL reason behind its renovation. No extraterrestrials or faked moon landings here, but a little men-in-black hanky-panky might be at play.

In "curious like a cat" mode, a friend and I poked our heads in here a few years back, before the renovation began. Sure enough, it was some sort of call center, and when someone finally noticed that we had gained entry without signing in, we were escorted out, firmly but not all angry-like. Since, I've learned of the build-out of that giant communications tower on Washington as an emergency communications device. And more recently, I've noticed that a mysteriously named URS Corporation is listed as having 35 Empire Blvd as an address. Now, all of this may very well be on the up-and-up and easily determined by professional sleuths. But I do most of my research the way y'all do...with a cup of coffee and a laptop...so sue me if I'm wrong. (Actually don't, I have no liability policy. Please, I beg of you, don't sue me.)

Take a look at those HAZMAT suits in the picture on the URS website. Sure enough, one of this sinister corp's "products" is consulting with governments to think about the unthinkable, and plan for the un-plannable. This was all the confirmation I needed to a rumor I'd heard over at the Community Board that the new and improved center will actually be a command center in case of a terrorist or natural disaster situation, particularly if communications are attacked or disabled. I've actually met a guy who consults with the City over what it would do if NYC was attacked by chemical or biological weapons, for instance. Cyber attacks can  be as minor as a downed bank website, but a sophisticated cyber-terrorist could knock out whole networks of power and communication, so a center like the one at 35 Empire could be crucial to coordinating defense or relief efforts.

Or so they say. Perhaps, even THAT explanation is a cover for something deeply, deeply, secret.

(read on at your own risk. THEY're watching, if they're not too busy texting.)

I'm not saying I know for sure, but I believe the City may be involved in a plot to "frack" all along Empire Boulevard, polluting our water with deadly toxins as part of an internationally clandestine plan with BP to finance a massive mercenary cyborg operation capable of preventing another Oprah-like domination of daytime TV. It's well-known among "truthers" and similarly knowledgeable underground heroes that the government has long feared a radical Oprah operative, possibly of Arab descent, with ties to the Elders of Zion (who would have ever guessed THAT unholy alliance!), with the power to make everyone in America read the same book. Think about it; what if that book was a masked call to sharia-law-inspired revolution, rather than, say, "A Million Little Pieces" by the Lance-esque liar James Frey? THAT's what's going on at 35 Empire, and it's also the reason so much fast food has been placed in its midst, as Wendy's, McDonalds and Checkers are all part of the plot, and have provided secret cloaking devices in all their hamburgers (not the cheeseburgers, which have a tendency to goo up the high-tech ether-powered-circuits).

Go ahead; quote me. I dare you.