The Q at Parkside

(for those for whom the Parkside Q is their hometrain)

News and Nonsense from the Brooklyn neighborhood of Lefferts and environs, or more specifically a neighborhood once known as Melrose Park. Sometimes called Lefferts Gardens. Or Prospect-Lefferts Gardens. Or PLG. Or North Flatbush. Or Caledonia (west of Ocean). Or West Pigtown. Across From Park Slope. Under Crown Heights. Near Drummer's Grove. The Side of the Park With the McDonalds. Jackie Robinson Town. Home of Lefferts Manor. West Wingate. Near Kings County Hospital. Or if you're coming from the airport in taxi, maybe just Flatbush is best.

Friday, June 29, 2012

The Smoothie Wars of Summer

Staring each other down across the Flabenue they wait, crouched and ready to pounce on your smoothie thirst, blender at the ready. B'Fruitee and Purpleberry are all about the remarkably durable smoothie creation, a confection that has been popular since the last Ice Age, when Cavemen would typically crush elderberries by placing them between check and gum, much like chewing tobacco, then spit them into frozen holes dug from the ice in the shape of mammoth tusks. 15 minutes later, Thorg would scoop out the slush and serve it to the family - this was one of his three masculine contributions to the preparation of food for the ice-cave family. The others were waffles and home-made fudge, but only weekends or holidays. Some of those cave-holidays exist to this day, though their date and significance remain a secret to all but a few direct descendents.


The Q has tried each spot, and my nod goes to Purpleberry - I liked the raw-sugar ratio, and the other offerings I spied. But B'Fruitee was good too, so feel free to weigh in here. And believe it or not, the Q has a fresh smoothie story to share with you. On one of my many post-surgery trips to the Eye and Ear Infirmary on 14th Street, I took the double-long 14th Street bus to my destination from the subway. This particular day, last Tuesday, there was but a single seat remaining near the very back. I was feeling blind and lazy, so I headed for it. There was just one woman standing, her fists clenched not one but two cold beverages with straws. I smiled, and proceeded to spin and sit, a move I've perfected using the guard rails to swivel into an MTA seat with balletic grace. Halfway down, with gravity in command, I heard someone blurt out "nooooooooooooooo," but my "load" was nearly fully "taken off" and I landed fully and expressly into a giant puddle of Jamba Juice. I knew the name of the offending beverage by the perky logos on the standing-lady's plastic cups, one of which was nearly empty. Not being one to carry a roll of paper towels or even an extra set of dungarees, I decided to blurt out "just one of those days I guess" and, feeling humiliated and angry that the Jamba lady hadn't warned me about her mishap, I stepped off the M14 onto the curb, slunk into the hospital and headed for the bathroom, where I returned again and again to spend a goodly amount of time with my buttocks backed up to the automatic hand-dryer. I believe someone owes the Q a free smoothie?

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

That's such a sad story! One of those days indeed. I got a buffalo chicken wrap at Purple Berry today. Haven't tried the smoothies yet. The place is clean and organized. The women working in there were really gracious and nice. The sandwich was decent. The tortilla was noticeably fresh not hard n crusty, and the ingredients were fresh/tasty. It was pretty heavily sauced. And a little pricey at $6.99 for not being huge and/or coming with chips or some side. Still I'll definitely go back. I want to try the breakfast sandwiches. They sound good with unique, better ingredients (in other words they're not just eggs and cheddar on bread).

Anonymous said...

B'Fruitee actually has great coffee. Better than (dare I say!) the Blue Roost.

LoryHey said...

I quite like B'Fruitee. I've been there several times and had wonderful smoothies, vegetable juices, and one of their delicious little croissants. They are always very friendly, and they are happy to put my juice in my kleen kanteen if I ask (some places give me grief about that). They've won my heart and my stomach!

ariellapapa.com said...

I like that Purpleberry has kids (meaning cheaper)smoothies. AND the iced coffee is also less expensive than BR. Want to try B'Fruitee. Maybe Clarkson Flatbed should set up a blind taste test.

Leah said...

I love B'Fruitee. Their smoothies are delicious, made with fresh fruit instead of frozen, no sugar or syrups, just a base of your choice (milk, soy milk, yogurt). I've had the homemade croissants too, and they're delicious. The coffee, I agree is better, and cheaper than Blue Roost (same with the baked goods). I've already almost earned a free smoothie with their loyalty card, and the owner is really nice. I have not tried Purpleberry, but I like that B'Fruitee is not a chain.

babs said...

PurpleBerry is not a chain either - maybe you're thinking of PinkBerry, the frozen yogurt chain. The day a PinkBerry opens in PLG I'll faint.

ElizabethC said...

According to their Facebook page they were "established in 2007". At a different location?

Clarkson FlatBed said...

They told me they have another shop in Virginia. I suspect like many ambitious entrepreneurs they want more locations. I don't think the word "chain" is apt just yet, but who knows? Maybe one day they'll give Jamba Juice a run for their money. And remember Orange Julius? Does that even exist anymore? And was that a smoothie or some sort of ancestor?

ElizabethC said...

Orange Julius does still exist, but sadly the closest one is in NJ.

danielle said...

I really like B'fruitee!!