The Q at Parkside

(for those for whom the Parkside Q is their hometrain)

News and Nonsense from the Brooklyn neighborhood of Lefferts and environs, or more specifically a neighborhood once known as Melrose Park. Sometimes called Lefferts Gardens. Or Prospect-Lefferts Gardens. Or PLG. Or North Flatbush. Or Caledonia (west of Ocean). Or West Pigtown. Across From Park Slope. Under Crown Heights. Near Drummer's Grove. The Side of the Park With the McDonalds. Jackie Robinson Town. Home of Lefferts Manor. West Wingate. Near Kings County Hospital. Or if you're coming from the airport in taxi, maybe just Flatbush is best.

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Tuesday's Community Board Meeting, In Verse

Were you there? No? Here's what you missed, in a poem:

We met at SUNY Downstate
We were told not to stay there too late
Only from seven to nine
So we tried to start right on time

No one knew ol' Robert's Rules
So we started to all seem like fools
The Rabbi he wanted no Slow Zone
The Committee Chair wanted to Postpone

(Who the hell doesn't want speed humps?
They're not hard on cars like the speed bumps
More than all other neighborhoods
Ours cares more for cars than their fellows' broods)

(Okay, I know that's a reach
But Byron himself I beseech
His rhymes
They did sucketh
Too sometimes)

Ne'ertheless came the new liquor licenses
Some claim there's just too many vices and
I don't buy that line of thinking
Since liquor stores cause more excess drinking

(I can handle some drunk outdoor loitering
but I don't care for that curbside toiletring)

The budget requests were approved
And we looked at the clock and so moved
To create a new subcommittee
Because our old bylaws are shitty

We ran out of time, agitator
You will have to wait until later
To spew out your threats of more lawsuit
Over stuff that most folks couldn't give a hoot

Ms. Boyd wasted our time
At the last two meetings, that's fine
But now she must wait her turn
Patience she just needs to learn

I wish Dwayne had issued apology
But I think there's a gap in his knowledge he
Seems to need coaching in leadership
Thus the Q bids farewell to his readership

Occupy Crown Street? Thx Ernie Ern for the photo


The Snob said...

Thy prosody I hath often held in High regard
Q, but who the devil knew such a talented scribe
Dwelled in our neighborhood?
(Aye, "hard" that should be, but my rhymes
Sucketh anon at times.)

MikeF said...


Ernie Ern said...

Nice speaking with you on Monday Tim. This is actually my photo - I wanted to get more but I just wanted to get the hell outta dodge at this point. Glad to see it making the rounds on the internets!

Clarkson FlatBed said...

Likewise! Credit changed...

Let the merry mirth making continue!

Liz said...

Amazing recap